5 Minute Face (for new moms and new mom sympathizers)

Trying to look presentable with a baby fresh out of the womb is hard. Yes, they seemingly sleep 18 hours a day, but unfortunately none of those hours are when I’m trying to get ready. More often than not my hair hasn’t been combed and I opt for a no-makeup look. If I’m lucky my clothes will not have boob milk on them.

When Little Love turned 4 weeks I decided I needed to put some me-time in. The bags under my eyes won’t disappear on their own much to my dismay; but concealer was invented for times such as these. I used to obsessively watch What Not to Wear back in the day, before TV and free time became a luxury, and I remember when it was time for makeup the artist always spoke about a “five minute face.”

I have since attended several major occasions in the time that Little Love has been alive and I’ve had help with him for those, so that I could do my hair and makeup and look like a functioning human being. On a day-to-day basis, however, I’ve been struggling to find a simple routine that I can do while Little Love sleeps.

So here it is, my personal five minute makeup routine:

Please note that everyone has different features to play up. My eyes tend to always be my focus when I’m doing my makeup, so I have to put something on them. The bags under my eyes are the bane of my existence, so I figure if I focus on playing up my eyes and trying to trick people into thinking I get sleep, I might win Most Put-Together Mom 2017. All products listed are from the drugstore because all of my money is going to Little Love’s initiative to keep his bum clean via diapers.

  1. Foundation:

I watched a video about making your makeup appear less cakey and laughed. I have 5 minutes. It will cover all the redness and some of the discoloration. Who cares if it’s cakey. We’re going for realistic expectations here. From far away no one can tell.


I’ve been using this BB cream. It’s under $10 and with “Radiance” in the title I can  pretend the sun is beaming from my face

  1. Concealer:

The MVP for moms everywhere. I remember using concealer when I was 18. Let’s all laugh now. I yearn for the days when my skin was beautiful and not combo oily/dry (seriously hormones, get it together) and I had zero baggage (especially under my eyes).


I use this concealer first because it claims to erase dark circles. It’s trying its best.


I follow with this concealer which brightens my under-eye.

  1. Mascara:

A good curl and waterproof mascara will really brighten up the overall appearance of the eyes. Also, waterproof means when you’re sitting there as a new mom, crying, wondering if you’re doing anything right, it’ll all be okay.


I’ve been using this waterproof mascara by L’Oreal. I’ve loved all of their waterproof mascaras.

Optional steps:
At this point my child can sense he isn’t the center of my world and usually wants to eat or be held. If I have time I might do a sweep of blush or some setting spray. I might get a little crazy and add some highlighter or simple eyeliner. Depends what I’m feeling and how much time I have. It also depends on my allotted time for figuring out what to wear that’s boob-milk free and if my hair is having its own meltdown.

If you’re favorite feature is your lips or cheeks, focus on those as opposed to hiding the dark stormy abyss under your eyes or the patchy dry skin as a result of sandpaper hormones. You’ll figure it out!

I am fully aware that hygiene is important; but I am also aware that sleep is equally important. So is being fed and feeling like a person. Other steps that can help you feel put together include brushing your teeth, washing your face, and having a shower every now and then.

Maintaining your eyebrows is a game changer. When my eyebrows are neat, the appearance of the bags under my eyes lessens by 35%. It has been scientifically proven. If you wanna get crazy, teeth-whitening or a face mask will lighten up everything and you’ll be the envy of all the new moms on the block!

I have a lot of respect for the new moms that can juggle their baby while continuing to look fierce. I am not one of them. Hopefully when Little Love is a tad older I can share my wisdom but for now, my wisdom lies in the practice of do the best you can.

Happy hygiene and see y’all soon.


4 thoughts on “5 Minute Face (for new moms and new mom sympathizers)

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